For most of my 55 years, I thought I had a weight problem. Lots of us do, right? But a little over a year ago, God began speaking to me about this issue. Have you ever argued with God? I do, it's definitely a learning and growing process! At the time of this debate with God, I was overweight and feeling guilty about it, followed by feeling defensive when confronted about it. So I pointed out to God that there were lots of other people who are heavy who have great ministries and service to Him. I even named them, so He would be sure to take note. But God...(there's those words again)!
But God wanted to deal with me, not those others. And my prayers often include my desire to serve God more deeply and meaningfully. That means I want to be obedient, right? Well, as God pointed out to me, I wasn't being obedient in the matter of gluttony. That's right, the perspective is aligned correctly now. I don't have a weight problem, never had a weight problem. I have a gluttony problem. Puts blame directly where it belongs - on me.
And so I am carving a new path of obedience, with a concentrated effort on being who God wants me to be in the area of eating This is not about a diet, or about exercise. It is not about how good I feel. It is most assuredly not about how I look or fit into those smaller sizes (a real temptation, so I moved the mirror into another room). Have I struggled? Oh boy, almost every day. Is it worth it? Emphatically yes!!!
In submitting (giving up, admitting another authority over myself), I am finding joy, of a depth I never experienced before. Why was I so stubborn on this issue? Why did it take so long to apply lessons learned in other areas to this particular aspect of my life? Why is God so patient with me? Amazing grace of our Lord Jesus Christ!!
Psalm 13:5-6
But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for he has been good to me.
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